Safety Slogans for the Wife
There is always the important aspect of safety, when giving gifts to someone that you love. In my case, my wife was a bit of a complainer. It seemed that no matter what gift I gave her, she was upset because it wasn't good enough. It got to the point that she told me on no uncertain terms that she better be getting something really nice and that I better take better care of her.
She made it abundantly clear that my life would be in danger, should the next gift not be what she wanted. She wanted something that would she could look out the window and see in the driveway, that was beautiful, and that could go 0-60 in under six seconds. And, it should move into higher numbers very quickly.
You can guess what happened. The next day she looked out the window to see a beautiful bathroom scale.
I started laughing and she got so mad at me that I had to call the safety hotline for help.